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Saturday 10 August 2013

Be Happy Post Series | Confidence is Key !


Hello, my lovelies!

I hope you’ve all had a lovely week! I’m finally back from my little break from blogging! The past few weeks have been hectic – between one thing and another, I just haven’t had the time to sit down and dedicate any real effort to writing new posts! On the odd occasion where I did have a spare half hour to just sit down and write, I was stopped in my tracks by the most awful writers’ block – what a nightmare!

Anyway, I’m glad to tell you guys that after taking a few weeks off to clear my head and get inspired, I’ve decided to start a new post series on being happy! We all know that from time to time, little problems and stresses can add up and start to get to us. Whether that be the stresses of work and day-to-day life, or even our insecurities and self-doubts – all of these things can leave us feeling a little downhearted and gloomy. From my own experience I know that sometimes, when we’re feeling a little low, we stop noticing the little things in life that once made us happy, and start letting them pass us by. Whether it be a smile from a stranger, or a long phone call from someone that you miss, we sometimes stop noticing and appreciating all those little things that we love and that make us happy.

So, I’d like to share with you guys some of the little steps that I’ve taken over the years to help myself to feel happier, whether that be during difficult times in my life, or just after a stressful day at work! (Also, just a little disclaimer before we get started – I’m in no way insinuating that these are definitive tips that will work for everyone, I’m just sharing some of the methods that have helped me out over the past few years in the hope that they will help some of you guys!).


Let’s start off this post series with a little chat about confidence! Everyone has struggled with confidence issues at some point in their life. One of the main things that have really held me back over the years has been my confidence – or my lack of it. Having super low self-confidence really impacted on my happiness.
Until I was around fifteen, I was constantly bullied by certain people at my school. I’m guessing that a lot of you guys have been in the same situation, and know exactly how horrible it feels. After years of being constantly picked on and made to feel bad about myself, my self-confidence was at rock bottom. Not only did I not have the confidence to go out by myself or try to meet new people for fear of running into these bullies out with school, but I’d also started to despise the way that I looked. I’d constantly compare myself to the ‘popular’ girls in my year and convince myself that I’d never be as ‘pretty’ or as ‘perfect’ as they were.

It got to the point where I’d dread having to go to school every day and face these people. I spent my first few years at high school trying to avoid these people in the hope that they wouldn’t notice me or say anything to me – it was almost as if I was trying to make myself invisible. That’s when I decided that things had to change. 


It took me a long time, but I finally realised that I shouldn’t allow these cruel, spiteful people to dictate the way that I lived my life. I’d spent so many years hiding away and letting these people take advantage of my shyness and insecurities, and for what? By letting these people make me feel worthless, I was allowing them to feel better about themselves. I realised that these people were only making these hateful comments about me because they could, and because I let them, not because they were true. It was time to stand up for myself!

Obviously, my confidence didn’t grow overnight. The first time that I stood up for myself in front of these bullies, I was super nervous, but I knew that by acting confident and speaking back to them, they’d learn that I was no longer the easy target that I once had been – fake it ‘till you feel it! Naturally, these bullies didn’t just disappear, but over time they became bored of picking on me when they realised that they’d stopped getting the reaction that they craved out of me.

Building up your confidence, particularly if you’re super shy like I was, is never going to be an easy journey, but if you truly believe in yourself and keep pushing yourself towards your goals, you’ll reap the rewards in the end. In the past few years my confidence has really grown, which has not only allowed me to feel much more outgoing and comfortable in my own skin, but being more confident has also made me a much happier, cheerful person! Let’s face it – no-one feels truly happy when they are being restricted by their shyness and insecurities. The key is not to let these things hold you back! Being confident about who you are - and loving who you are! - is the first step on the path to happiness. Make a list of things that you love about yourself. Whether it’s your shiny hair, your sense of style, or even just your great timekeeping skills – learn to appreciate these as the things that make you unique! Make sure you tell yourself that you are beautiful and you are special every single day, even if you don’t believe it – never let anyone tell you otherwise! 



Don’t let your insecurities get in the way of your happiness. There will always be people out there who make horrible comments about others just to make themselves feel better, but that doesn’t mean that the things they say are true! Everyone is insecure about something – it’s only natural! – but by being insecure about absolutely everything about yourself, you’re just filling yourself with pointless worries and anxieties! List the things that you are insecure about, and realise which ones are just silly – by ditching these unnecessary anxieties, you’ll learn to love yourself for who you really are.

Last but not least – push yourself! Building confidence isn’t just about loving who you are – set yourself goals, and really try to push yourself out of your comfort zone! Maybe you’re nervous about meeting new people or giving speeches in front of crowds – do whatever scares you! Not only will pushing yourself to do something that scares you give you a huge confidence boost, but it’ll also make it so much easier to do that particular thing again – practice makes perfect!


So, there you have it! I really do believe that confidence is the first step towards happiness – I mean, how can you be truly happy if you can’t even be confident in your own skin?! I hope that you guys enjoyed this post, and I really hope that even a few of you might have found it useful! Do you guys have any tips for building your confidence? I’d love to hear them!
See you all next time!


Much love,




10 comments :

  1. This is a great post! Confidence really is key to so many things. It was great to read about your journey of overcoming your bullies. As a kid it's almost impossible to see it this way, but now whenever anyone is rude to me I just think about what it means about them. My favorite thing to think is.. happy people don't act that way to others. If they're doing this to me they must be just miserable. On the other hand, I am happy. So I should not hold anger, if anything I should pity them.

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    1. Thanks so much ! Yeah, I totally agree. When I was younger, I didn't realise that I just needed to have the confidence to stand up bullies, whereas now, if I don't like how someone is treating me, I let them know ! You're totally right, such a good point. People like that only put others down to make themselves feel better !

      Much love, Sarah.

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  2. This is a great post. It's always nice to hear positive, inspirational things :)
    Adela x

    misspinkstyle.net

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    1. Thanks so much, such a sweet comment :).

      Much love, Sarah.x

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  3. Really like the sound of this series of blog posts. Totally agree with you. If you pretend to be confident, people will think you're confident and in turn, it gives you a bit of a confidence boost.

    Looking forward to reading more.. Your blogging break definitely worked!

    HELen

    pierrelecat

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    1. Thanks, sweetie ! I was a little nervous about doing it in case people weren't interested ! Yeah, you're totally right, acting confident is definitely the first step towards really feeling confident !
      Aw thanks, that's so sweet !

      Much love, Sarah.x

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  4. I've been thinking of doing a post like this for ages. I always go through spurts of feeling unhappy and its posts like this that make you realise you're not the only one! x

    www.crazylins.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Me too, I think that everyone feels a little unhappy sometimes !

      Much love, Sarah.x

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  5. Love this post and can't wait to read more!

    What are some of the things you've done (besides standing up to the bullies) that have pushed your limits and helped you grow?

    www.myprettyfaceplace.com

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    1. Thanks so much ! :)

      After I finally decided to stand up to these bullies, I really pushed myself to get out there and make some new friends. I was super shy and self-conscious, and I was always worried about coming across as being weird and awkward in front of people. So I made a huge effort to join new clubs, or sit next to different people in my classes and really try to talk to them and get to know them! I also started trying out a lot of new clothes and styles, like, things that I usually wouldn't be comfortable with. Discovering that I actually looked good in clothes that I would never usually wear and getting excited about buying new clothes and planning outfits was a huge confidence boost too!

      Much love, Sarah.x

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